Your dream wedding:
when do i get to the cool stuff in this blogging challenge like “pitch a neat idea for a website”? incidentally my answer would be www.awkwardgait.com. this site would feature uploaded vids of people walking awkwardly. like the dude waddling ferociously to keep up his pants (a belt, a length of rope or suspenders would work wonders) and the woman wearing 6 inch heels WITH a pointy toe whose feet are screaming expletives at her with every step. take em’ off girl! i know they hurt! feet were made to spread out and grab the earth! those geniuses over at Birkenstock have the right idea! let them toes spread! lol!!!!
ok. i digress. suffice it to say that this topic kinda stumped me. i never was the kinda little girl who dreamed about wedding planning and wedding dresses. i did dream about having a husband and kids though. and i dreamed about having a quaint little bungalow of a house with over stuffed chairs and lamps that cast a warm glow 🙂 lemme digress again before i burst into this song (minus the bit about ‘dating a semi sadist’):
so dream wedding…hmm…my own wedding was quite simple. we had the essentials, me, him, the presiding clergyman (Imam), some well wishers and food afterwards. i did love my dress but it wasn’t selected after days, months or years of pouring over bridal magazines. i went to an Indian clothing boutique and in a matter of maybe 20 minutes I selected a beautiful silver 2 piece ensemble with a matching dupatta (an enormous, stiff, heavy, what-am-i-supposed-to-do-with-this? shawl).
the pc thing to do would be to say that my own wedding was my idea of my dream wedding. that statement’d be about 3/4 true. i’d keep the getting-down-to-brass-tacks elements of my wedding but i’d add something new. following the nuptials there’s there’d be a quiz show portion. it’d be after because the idea is not to encourage bride and/or groom to back out. its purpose would center on starting off the rest of your lives together with a healthy dose-o-reality. it’d have questions like (bride to groom):
- on a scale of 1-5, with 1 being ‘well i never!’ and 5 being ‘sometimes a mans gotta do what a mans gotta do’, how likely are you to leave your toenail clippings strewn about willy nilly and pell mell?
- i go to sleep with the tv on and if you ‘sneak’ and turn it off i’ll instantly awaken. is that a problem for you?
- have you ever heard of a book called Fascinating Womanhood? do you understand that if you ever quote from it i’ll likely go check that book out at my local library (making sure its a hardback edition), and beat you about the head and shoulders with it?
now that that’s said and done. lets commence with the wedded bliss! 😀
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whats your idea of a dream wedding? do share!! if you don’t let me know you’re here it’s like i’m talking to myself. and that makes me look crazy.
your feet are plotting revenge!! liberate them!
life on tuesday 